GHOSTING: FRIENDING OR FIENDING THE WORLD

 

GHOSTING: FRIENDING OR FIENDING THE WORLD

I have reached the limits of medicine and science. I have had the best visit with Matt Edwardson, MD, Associate Professor of Neurology & Rehabilitation Medicine, at Georgetown University to explain my condition and explore options for rehabilitation. If you are a Christian, pray to God that He sends you a doctor like "Dr. E". The good doctor is making the Lord well-pleased. Dr, E saw me not as a patient but a person. He subscribes to my philosophy, "I'm a person that happens to be a patient not a patient that happens to be a person." He was glorious in doing research on me and being prepared for my visit. He respected my intellect and my pursuit of knowledge. I respect his wisdom and compassion. He had to deliver to me some hard news but God readied me to receive it as He prepared Dr. E to deliver it. When the exam was done, He prayed for me and my wife. He prayed for my wife's and mine well being and that God would use me as a strong, stroke survival advocate. Dr, E and my home physician. Dr. Paul S. Rhodes, MD, Geriatric Medicine, have given me a better look at medicine and science. My wife said, "He's the one who reads your blog".

Dr.E. gave me the hard news. My first stroke was an ischemic stroke. Ischemic strokes happen when a blood clot blocks a blood vessel in your brain. They are medical emergencies and can be fatal. The blockage was to the main left artery to the brain. The main left artery to the brain is the left common carotid artery, which branches into the internal carotid artery that supplies the brain and the external carotid artery that supplies the face and neck. The left common carotid artery is one of the two common carotid arteries that supply blood to the brain, face, and neck. It arises directly from the aortic arch and travels up the neck before splitting. The second was in prime real estate-the brain stem. A rare brain stem stroke. A brainstem stroke is an injury to the brainstem caused by a blockage of blood flow (ischemic) or bleeding (hemorrhagic). It can cause a range of symptoms depending on the affected area, including severe dizziness, vertigo, trouble with balance, slurred speech, double vision, and weakness. Recovery may require intensive physical, occupational, and speech therapy, and even small strokes can lead to significant symptoms because the brainstem controls vital functions like breathing, consciousness, and movement.  Brainstem strokes make up about 10% to 15% of all strokes and are often caused by ischemic events, which are strokes from blood clots. They account for roughly 11% of all ischemic strokes. Brainstem strokes are particularly dangerous because they can impact breathing, heart rate, and consciousness. Some studies show a high 1-year mortality rate (around 11.7%) for brainstem strokes caused by intracranial arterial stenosis. 

The National Institute of Health (NIH) reports:"Globally, there is a rise in lifestyle diseases like cardiovascular disease, stroke, and diabetes mellitus, both in developed and developing nations. The global burden of stroke can be measured at 122 million disease-adjusted life years] In the US, a stroke is reported every 40 seconds Studies have estimated that 10% to 15% of all strokes occur in the brainstem. The lifetime risk of stroke in individuals aged 25 years and older for males is between 23.3% and 26.0%, and for females is between 23.7% and 26.5%. The incidence varies between regions, with Eastern sub-Saharan Africa having the lowest lifetime risk of 11.8% and East Asia with the highest risk of 38.8%. China has the most significant lifetime estimated risk of 39.3%.

Pontine is the most prevalent site of brainstem strokes, involved with 60% of infarctions (see Image. Pontine Infarction). Ischemic vertebrobasilar strokes account for 23%, whereas ischemic brainstem infarcts comprise 11% of all ischemic strokes. Approximately 27%, 14%, and 7% involve the pons, medulla, and midbrain. The cerebella is involved in 7%, posterior cerebral artery territory in 36%, and concurrent multiple sites involved in 9%. Isolated pons infarcts were observed in 3% of all ischemic strokes." Apparently, the positioning of my stroke on the stem precludes me from most surgeries and innovations leaving me with the only non-invasive treatment available-rehabilitation. Hence, in my current state, my current condition leaves me lame for life. Despite the news, I believe that I will walk again. Not now but God is in the when. Someday.

Personally, I can't wait for Sherlock to show-up and put up 2+2 and come up with 4. I was admitted for an ischemic stroke and assaulted by a nurse and two technicians then suffered a rare brain stem stroke. Know correlation. Yes, an assault can cause a stroke through direct injury, such as a head or neck trauma that damages blood vessels, or indirectly through extreme stress, which can trigger a hemorrhagic stroke. Physical trauma from an assault can lead to blood clots or vessel damage, while severe emotional stress can cause a sudden spike in blood pressure that ruptures a vulnerable blood vessel. Yes, it is possible to file a civil lawsuit for a stroke caused by an assault. An assault is a violent, intentional act, and if that act leads to serious medical consequences like a stroke, the victim can seek compensation for their injuries. Proving the connection, however, requires establishing a clear legal link between the assault and the stroke. A plaintiff must demonstrate that the assault was the direct cause of the stroke. This often requires expert medical testimony to establish the link between the traumatic event and the stroke. Medical experts recognize several ways a physical assault can lead to a stroke. These are often categorized as traumatic cerebrovascular injuries (BCVIs), which can cause strokes in 10% to 20% of patients who suffer them. Of  the leading causes of traumatic brain injury, assault may be the most difficult to accept. These injuries can be sustained in physical attacks ranging from robbery to rape, domestic violence to child abuse. Not only is assault the leading cause of traumatic brain injury in Americans between ages of 15 and 24, but it is also the leading cause of brain injury death for infants, toddlers and preschoolers—children below the age of four. Assault victims who prove that the assault that caused their brain injury was due to the negligence of another party, are entitled to seek compensation for damages caused by the injury. Just waiting for a wise and hungry lawyer on the battlefield, until then, I will stand as a warrior.

What does a man think about when he is told that he is at risk of a fatal stroke, being lame for life, vision problems and more, Ghosting! What is ghosting? Ghosting is the act of abruptly ending all communication with someone without explanation. It typically occurs in romantic relationships but can happen in friendships and professional settings, often facilitated by technology like dating apps and text messaging. While often seen as a hurtful and passive-aggressive behavior, it is sometimes used by the ghoster to avoid direct confrontation or because they feel unsure how to end the relationship otherwise. 

I thank God that people left my life like a wave at high tide. What remained was solid and true.

My Mom, my wife, Francine, and my long time friend and business partner, Bonnie, would confide, "Those people that you are attracting are using you." I spent my life running from this, avoiding the eventual "I told you so." I was gifted by God, very talented and handsome. Instead of leading people to God, I led people to me. I liked being told that I was gifted. I had long been persecuted for my belief in God and my ideology so it was great to have an attraction that gave me solace. I thought my gifts were friending the world but the world was fiending me. "They just want you for your gifts and when they are done, they'll be gone." THE TRUTH HURTS.

Friend (n.) is Old English freond "one attached to another by feelings of personal regard and preference," from Proto-Germanic *frijōjands "lover, friend" (source also of Old Norse frændi, Old Danish frynt, Old Frisian friund, Dutch vriend, Middle High German friunt, German Freund, Gothic frijonds "friend"), from PIE *priy-ont-, "loving," present-participle form of root *pri- "to love."Meaning "a Quaker" (a member of the Society of Friends) is from 1670s. Feond ("fiend," originally "enemy") and freond often were paired alliteratively in Old English; both are masculine agent nouns derived from present participle of verbs, but they are not directly related to one another (see fiend). Related: Friends. Fiend (n.) is Old English feond "enemy, foe, adversary," originally present participle of feogan "to hate," from Proto-Germanic *fijand- "hating, hostile" (source also of Old Frisian fiand "enemy," Old Saxon fiond, Middle Dutch viant, Dutch vijand "enemy," Old Norse fjandi, Old High German fiant, Gothic fijands), from suffixed form of PIE root *pe(i)- "to hurt" (source also of Sanskrit pijati "reviles, scorns;" Avestan paman-, name of a skin disease; Greek pema "disaster, sorrow, misery, woe;" Gothic faian "to blame"). As spelling suggests, the word originally was the opposite of friend (n.). Both are from the active participles of the Germanic verbs for "to love" and "to hate." Boutkan says the "fiend" word was a Germanic analogical formation from the "friend" word. According to Bammesberger ["English Etymology"], "The long vowel in FIEND is regular. In FRIEND the vowel has been shortened; perhaps the shortening is due to compounds like FRIENDSHIP, in which the consonant group (-nds-) regularly caused shortening of the preceeding long vowel." Fiend at first described any hostile enemy (male and female, with abstract noun form feondscipe "fiendship"), but it began to be used in late Old English for "the Devil, Satan" (literally "adversary") as the "enemy of mankind," which shifted its sense to "diabolical person" (early 13c.). The old sense of the word devolved to foe, then to the imported word enemy. For spelling with -ie- see field. Meaning "devotee (of whatever is indicated)," as in dope fiend, is from 1865.

Key KJV scriptures about God as a friend include James 2:23 ("Abraham believed God, and it was called the Friend of God"), John 15:14-15 ("I have called you friends; for all things that I have heard of my Father I have made known unto you"), and Proverbs 18:24 ("A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly: but there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother"), which can be interpreted to refer to God's close relationship with believers. There are over fifty (50) scriptures of "God as friend to the believer". I love John 15:13: "Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends." Greater is megas in the Greek, Strong's G3173. It means, ''of God's preeminent blessings'. Love is "agape",. Strong's G26 means, "affection, good will, love, benevolence, brotherly love". The phrase "lay down' is Strong's G5087 - tithēmi and means "to bend down, to lay off or aside, to wear or carry no longer, to lay by, lay aside money ". Life is Strong's G5590 - psychē and means, ''the breath of life, the vital force which animates the body and shows itself in breathing". Friend is Strong's G5384 - philos which means, "he who associates familiarly with one, a companion" or "one of the bridegroom's friends who on his behalf asked the hand of the bride and rendered him various services in closing the marriage and celebrating the nuptials". My wife might like that last definition because I asked for her hand through my best friend and the best man at my wedding, Bob Garrison. He has gone on before me because of the controversial COVID fiasco. I believe that the labors of Dr. Anthony Fauci killed Bob. I asked Bob to ask Francine for her hand in marriage.

I have no regrets however, if I had to start over, I would use God's standard to discriminate people by friends. As I draw closer to that day I meet my Creator, the revelation of who my friends are becomes more plain to me, like a rainbow after the rain. Psychology Today writes, "Being ghosted feels confusing because you don't know if the relationship is really over, or if there is a different reason for the person's absence. You may worry that something terrible has befallen the person. When you do realize the relationship is over, you have no idea what happened or what you did wrong. You feel that you are to blame." I am not seeking guilt by association. I am not seeking a rush to my bedside. But know that their departure was unpleasant at best. As I await my great reward I want others to know that forgiveness is for us and accountability for them and ghosting is for us and having ghosted is for them. Psychology Today writes, "When ghosters decide to leave a relationship, they factor in the time they invested and the level of engagement in the relationship. If, for example, the two parties dated once or twice, disappearing may seem to be a viable decision for the ghoster. They do not wish to lead the other person on, and they rationalize the departure as compassionate and reasonable." I'm at peace with your departure but know that I still would've lain down my life for you.

To my grandson in the light of your lineage, you are beautiful and wise. You were made great by God from inception. You were the pride uf your great grandfather, Willie, and your grandfather, Ken. You were the greatest gift I ever received from my daughter, your mother, Jasmine. I forewarn you, no matter how much someone says they love never let them take a desire to fight for and protect your God-given natural rights. Thomas Jefferson wrote, "We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness". Defend yourself and your rights at all costs. All life will pass but God is eternal.

NEVER GIVE UP, NEVER GIVE IN, NEVER GIVE OVER!